The Canonical List of Band Jokes
A Nerdy Paradise of Band Humor
Oboe and Bassoon Jokes
Q: What's the difference between a bassoon solo and scraping your nails down the blackboard?
A: Vibrato.
Q: Why is a bassoon better than an oboe?
A: The bassoon burns longer.
Q: What is a burning oboe good for?
A: Setting a bassoon on fire.
Q: What's the difference between a bassoon and a trampoline?
A: You take your shoes off to jump on the trampoline!
Q: How many bassoonists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Only one, but they'll insist on going through about 5 bulbs before they find one that suits this particular room and situation.
Q: What are oboes good for?
A: Kindling when burning bassoons.
Q: Why does an oboist always have to fight for correct intonation?
A: Because most oboes are full of holes.
Q: How do you get an oboist to play A flat?
A: Take the batteries out of his tuner.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To get away from the oboe recital.
Q: How do you get five oboes in tune?
A: Shoot four of them.
Q: What do an oboe and a baseball have in common?
A: People cheer when you hit them with a bat.
Q: What is the difference between an oboe and an onion?
A: No one cries when you chop an oboe into little pieces.
Q: How do you keep a clarinet from being stolen?
A: Put it in an oboe case.
